Thank you for believing in me

I sincerely apologize for my lack of posts in the last two months. I'm not quite sure who I am apologizing to as I never really know who reads my ramblings, but at least a few people have bugged me about writing something. If you follow my fitness blog at all, you'll see I've been a little more active there. It's a little more lighthearted - recipe posts, my thoughts on fitness, etc. But I'm moving over here today.

To be honest, my heart has been dealing with a few big things (that I will write about soon), and it didn't feel right to post about anything else in the meantime. Not that I wait until I have it all together before I share something with you, but I really wanted to tell you about those things. But I couldn't yet. It's coming.

All of that got me thinking about "having it all together" and what that looks like in our world. Not so much the steady job, nice car, married with two kids scenario, but more of a spiritual and mental togetherness that qualifies us to lead and inspire other people. The idea of making sure you have it figured out before you try to help someone else.

I have learned so many times, as I'm sure you have too, that it truly is only God who qualifies us and we are never really "ready" for what He has planned for us next. He never asks us to have our lives figured out to darn near perfection before He leads us to lead others. We all know this in some way or another, and know that He fills in the gaps for where we don't measure up.

What I want to share and acknowledge are the people He uses to believe in and inspire us before we believe in ourselves. We have all had them in our lives. The beautiful people who walk into our messy little world and say in one way, shape or form, "You can do this. I believe in you." They may not even realize how much they have influenced you. But to you, it could be the difference of following your biggest dream or forever being too scared to try. I want to thank some of those people in my life. You probably have some similar ones, so think about them as you read about mine.

To the elementary school teacher who taught me and seven other students from grades one through six in our tiny little school on a hill: 

Thank you for believing in a rowdy class of seven year-olds who played "pet shop",
"orphanage", and even "dog pile" the moment you left the room. You knew we were nuts and you loved us for it. We all felt like your own kids, and you valued us, even when we didn't deserve it. Thank you for giving me extra school work and books to read, knowing my busy little brain needed a little more. Thank you for believing that we could be spiritual warriors, even at that age, and teaching us about the power of prayer, how to worship, and even the baptism of the Holy Spirit. I will never forget learning about and actually using the spiritual gifts when I was just in grade three, and knowing that I could be powerfully used by God, no matter my age. What an amazing gift.

To a few specific teachers in high school who thought better of me than I deserved:

Thank you for believing I was late for class after lunch because I was doing student council activities, when I was really just off in the bush up to no good. Ahem. Thank you for accepting me into student council as a shy little grade nine kid, and showing me what it meant to be a leader. You taught me how to influence my peers, set goals and make decisions, interview people, and plan events. All of this led to my passion for my current career, and I would have never guessed I possessed those skills. Thank you for making me speak in public when I didn't believe I could, only to find out I loved it and want to do it for the rest of my life. Thank you for causing me to rise to the challenges and believe I was always capable of more. 

To the director of a summer camp who put me in leadership positions at my lowest point:

Thank you for seeing past my enormous amount of imperfections and asking me to lead teams of girls. You didn't know it at the time, but I had hit rock bottom only a month prior and chose to spend my summer there in hopes of putting myself back together. My heart needed mending, and I knew Jesus would meet me there if I followed His leading. The plan was to duck my head and blend into the background while I quietly served and healed. But God knows that's never been my style and He had other plans in mind. Thank you for being obedient and putting me in roles I thought were best suited by other women; women who "had it all together" and who would do a better job than me at teaching girls how to love themselves, love each other, and that they are beautiful. Leading all of those amazing girls probably taught me more than them. I had no faith in myself, but you did, and by the grace of God, I rose to the occasion. You spoke words of life over me that I will never forget.  Thank you for believing anyone can be used, no matter their past.

To the co worker who trained me to do my job and knew I could handle the position of director:

Thank you for setting an incredible example of how to do this job well, while still having a ton of fun. You taught me the various skills that it takes and never criticized me in my learning curve. We went through some of the most difficult times our department had ever faced, but we gained so much valuable experience and we (let's be serious) totally rocked it together. But you taught me so much more than just work-related lessons. You were a mentor, both spiritually and relationally, and I gleaned so much wisdom from your fun-loving, yet intense and wise nature. I was terrified when you left, and didn't believe I could do the job without your guidance. But you had confidence I could step into that role, and knew I would succeed as the youngest director of the company. I love my job, and could have never gotten here without your faith in my abilities.

And finally, just to be cheesy...

To my husband who believes in me every day:

Thank you for believing your friend when he told you it would be worth to come to the library. You didn't know you would meet me, fall in love, and pursue me for the next year. Thank you for believing I would eventually say yes to your asking, and that it would lead to a wild adventure together. You believe in my goals when I don't see how they're possible. You show me the progress when I don't see it. You believe in my love, even when it's not shown. You believe in the power of us, even when we forget that we're on the same team. You make me accomplish greater things than I ever would on my own, and believe in the power of Christ in me. I wouldn't want anyone else on my team, and I believe in the power of our unity.

There are obviously so many more people I could write about (my incredible parents and brothers, God-given friends, encouraging trainers, every single one of you who read this blog, etc.) but this is a snapshot of the people who have influenced me by believing in me before I thought myself capable.

Now the challenge in this is not only to think about those people in your life, but to be the same for someone else. To be someone who encourages, inspires, leads, motivates, and believes in a person, even if they don't feel they have what it takes. To love people, truly unconditionally, and to see the potential and call it out in them. Find the gold in people and bring it to the surface. Make people feel valuable and worthy, even when it's not easily seen. You may have to dig a little and get all "diamond in the rough" on them. But think about the impact you could have on their life and the great things they could accomplish with your encouragement. The only thing it may cost you is a little pride, and the results are astounding.  

So think about the people who have influenced you, thank them if you can, and be that same person to someone else.